Tuesday, August 02, 2005

Cheshire Cat

Monday, August 1
Owen. Ex- Joan Of Arc.


In an attempt to make sure that the off topic forum doesn't take over my blogging, I'm going to sit here until I think of something to write about.

For example, Nine Planet Without Intelligent Life. Now, If I've written about this before then don't tell me because... I don't care. I just think it's really great. Some genuinely good writing. The thing about it though is that it's reeaallllly similar to an idea I once had about two robots in a world sans humanity...

It went a little something like this... And bare in mind I'm pretty much making this up as I go along. And it's not meant to be serious.

Back in good old 2030 Robots were fairly primitive, they couldn't really do a whole lot. Companies could hire them to collect letters; likewise they could do hand deliveries. The same Robot might be able to sort the mail and arrange it in order of importance... Maybe even reply to it. Primitive. They could really do much in the grand scheme of things.
One man though, arguably the greatest engineer of all time had created something quite special. Two things actually. Two robots, without names, they were just prototypes after all. Prototypes for Robots that fully emulated man, right down to anxiety and lust and genuine adaptable knowledge. Don't ask how this one man did it, I suppose he was a genius, perhaps a little eccentric. A genius, but careless, slightly mad.

One evening our engineer was experimenting with a cryogenic freezing device designed to work on mammals, Perhaps part of a plan to sustain his own life. This particular test involved freezing one whole monkey, into the television/microwave shaped machine it went. Submerged in a thin layer of something-or-other goo, and frozen. But oh my, this eccentric man must have rushed his work and a power surge in the machine give him a killer shock, leaving the monkey frozen.
A matter of 100s of years later this lab full of junk is still intact, dusty, many of the windows broken and painted shades of brown my thick dust. The lab is still scattered with many crazy ideas. Flying shoes, self-cooking pizza and even these two Robots, standing stationary with their switched turned to "off." And the cryogenic freezing machine, still purring in the corner, fully grown monkey still frozen inside it.

A rock crashes through one old window, sails over the self-cooking pizzas, over the loaf of paper, over the holographic canine and straight into the cryogenic freezing machine, breaking it. Or at least turning it off in a very harsh manner. The monkey successfully wakes up and happily scurries around this darkened lab. By some change, he happens to stumble upon one of the prototype Robots and flicks his switch to "on" and with that the Robots eyes light up and his body begins to move. The monkey screams and goes to hide under a table or something.

Now we have one robot, standing alone in the lab, equipped with little more than an extensive knowledge of absolutely everything up until the year 2030. Unfortunately it was now closer to 2430. But he doesn't know this, he's just confused as to how the lab got so dirty and so his immediate thought is to switch on his friend.

That's the part of the story that I clearly thought out. From here I know that they have a chat, decide to give themselves names. One of them calls himself "Nine" and the other one calling himself "Kelly". They go to the window and see a group of Robots playing sport with girders and rocks. The players don't notice out heroes but for some reason they all run away at once. Our two heroes notice the complete lack of human life. They explore the city and notice that everything is perfectly clean and tidy and there are no other robots around. They walk into a cafe and find it fully stocked but there are no staff... and so they help themselves. After other little talk they hear some commotion and the wall on the other side of the cafe crashes down.

I haven't worked out the details here but it seems the hygiene robots (Who don't resemble human so much as tanks) have gone loco and consider all other robots to be 'litter' that needs to be collected and compacted. Nine and Kelly escape thanks to the help of a renegade robot by the name of Sally or Sandy; she introduces them to a resistance of Robots trying to overthrow the Rubbish Collectors. Later on they make a pact to both break off their power switches which means that they will not ever be able to shut down.

Sandy/Sally tells them that a virus destroyed nearly all natural life and while this should have been the end of civilization, it wasn't. Robots lived on. The older models continued working as if humans were still alive, stocking cafes in the morning and taking the stock down at night etc etc. This is why the cafe that Nine and Kelly went into was open and full of food. The newer models, those capable of intelligent though were able to adapt to their new environment and carry on by themselves. The thing is, resources are limited, I haven't thought this through yet though. But they can't stay on earth forever.

This is just the first story, The Rubbish Collecting robots will be overthrown. Nine and Kelly will find another group of robots convinced that there was a sort of Noah's Arc type exodus and that humans will return and have built an elevator to the moon which has been packed to excess with bright neon lights. A beacon.None of the stories really go anywhere but as far as I can tell, Nine and Kelly leave Earth with Sally/Sandy because of some sort of conflict with the resistance... They drop Sally/Sandy off at Mars and just sort of... Go around space. Go back to earth a few times, travel to different planets... different space ships.

Should be pretty funny once I work it all out. I admit now, it doesn't sound all that hilarious. But yeah... I just need to buy a drawing tablet so I can draw it all out!!



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Comments:
TITAN 2430

geeze, didn't I leave a good review here earlier?

I guess a good review from Chris Titan is the same as being shit on?

Hahahaha, oh well...

I had great time exploring this world as I lay sick a a dog in bed all day...

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